I don't know what to think/do anymore...

I'll admit it. I'm a sucker for those dating self help books. The ones like "He's just not that into you" or "Why men love bitches" or my latest that is sitting right next to my bed "Act like a lady, think like a man" The number one reason I choose these books is simply because I don't know what to think/do anymore when it comes to dating.


If you look back at my history of dating dumb idiots. But am I the idiot? Am I supposed to follow these books step by step? Some say this, some say do that. It leaves me second guessing everything I do now a days. Which leaves me frustrated and unsure and makes me analyze the situation that much more. Am what I doing in this dating world normal?

I look at some people I know who have never had a problem dating. They meet. Fall in love. Get married. End of story.

Whoa. That's not how it happens in the Andrea story at all. It usually goes something like this: Meet potential guy. Guy seems semi normal. Guy is semi normal up until a point. Guy then does something usually shady to Andrea. Andrea then questions everything because basically every guy in Andrea's past has done something similar and is wondering if she will get duped again by shady stupid guy. Guy then proves all guys are scum bags. End of story. And then the vicious cycle happens again and again.

I then look at the books that I study and say "of course, in this books it points out the obvious signs of why he wasn't into me" Too bad I didn't read the book first and that way I could have gotten rid of the idiot prior to him making a fool of myself.

So case in point. Right now, M is for surely out of my life. Quick story short, by being bored at work I found out he is married and getting a divorce. Yes, getting a divorce is a good step, but being still married and him NOT mentioning it, even while one night he mentioned to me he was at the age of 19 thisclose to getting married. Ok so at 19 you were close to getting married, but by my detective work, I found out you ARE married. Awesome. But do you know what's really really really annoying me, besides the whole marriage thing? I called him Wednesday night a wee bit intoxicated. He did not return my phone call. I then called him Friday night due to school related stuff and when I asked, why he didn't return my phone call from Wednesday night, he said he never had a call from me. I then think to myself in the book "He's just not that into you" and realize, it's the year 2009 and M has an iphone. He didn't get my phone call? Riiiiiiiiight. Unless you live out by where my parents live and they don't get any cell phone reception, then sure I'll believe ya, but dude, I ain't buying it. Oh, and of course I then called him last night to thank him for school related things and he didn't call me back. But then that makes me question myself wondering if I scared him away by calling him to much. Again, since those books I read normally say "don't call a guy blah blah blah" I automatically think I'm the annoying one here and it's my fault.

And now I sit here questioning CBB's recent actions and in my head going through a timeline of everything and anything he has said/did since the last time I saw him. While a normal girl would not worry about CBB right now, I sit here and think in the back of my mind "he is just dragging me along for the ride and about to drop me at any second" It's like I'm trying to brace myself for the worst action possible, so I come to think of the worse case scenario. Welcome to my brain. Yes, telling me to just stop worrying would be awesome if I could just do exactly that.


Am I to blame in these failing relationships? Is it my fault? Is it the stupid shady guys fault? Should I throw out all and every dating book I have? (though not the one next to my bed, that's the libraries book and they aren't to fond of you throwing out their books and I'm not fond of paying a fine)

Worry wart alert.

Hey remember the time I made a post about me actually not worrying.

Here I sit 2 days later. Worried.

Why? I HAVE NO FREAKING CLUE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Normally when I worry, it's because something feels "off" or it's me analyzing the heck out of a situation.

Yes, I have been thinking about what CBB said the other day. He drunk text me last night and it was cute (no serious questions were asked)

WHAT THE HECK IS WRONG W/ ME? Why can't I just chillax for once? For a whole month I have nothing but a calm cool cucumber. But now I feel like I need to be admitted or something.

I put a rubber band around my wrist for anytime I think negative things I snapped it. Not sure if this will help the situation though.

Oh yeah, and doing some searching on the Internets yesterday I found out something about M. I will wait to talk to M about what I found before I post though.

Me thinks I like CBB just a smidgen more over M right now too. Sigh.

Well...he said it!

The 3 magical words a girl wants to hear!

CBB: I know this is a little far off..but whats gonna happen when I move back to River Falls?

Ok, so maybe it's not 3 words like I said, but at this stage, for a guy to say this to me, makes me pretty excited.

Though keep in mind, this was said over a text at 2:16am while he was extremely drunk and I was sleeping. Sooo maybe not "sweep me off my feet" material. But, as you know, drunk minds are one of the most truthful/honest minds out there.

I think that I'm excited that he is actually thinking of the future w/ me maybe in it. It's been one month since we met. I have yet to have my fear of him saying "see ya" and never texting or calling me again.

Oh and of course, he is at his dad's cabin for a few days, so we have yet to continue the conversation of what's going to happen. Just my kind of luck.

As for M. Things are still going good w/ him too. After a long cruddy day Wednesday he called me up and we went to see the Ice Age 3 movie. It was cute. M is very affectionate, caring and sweet.

I'm still stuck. I like them both. They both bring different things to the table and I enjoy spending time w/ both of them. It's like picking vanilla or chocolate. I can't decide!

When it rains, it pours...

And when it pours, you look around saying WTF? How did this happen?

While I was hesitant to post about this, I figured I need to be honest. While you are all familiar w/ CBB, there is also another boy thrown into the mix now. "M" we shall call him. M and I met back in the beginning of summer, 4 days after I met CBB. I know right? I go 4 months without a date to BAM, two cute, cool guys I enjoy hanging out with. M has flown in under the radar though. It's not like how CBB and I met at all. M and I met at school. While I'm normally surrounded by 95% females in my school, this is a general ed class that I have to take, so there is a significant higher selection of dudes for me finally.

M and I were randomly picked to be in the same group for the summer class. Of course Katie and I thought he was really really good looking. He honestly reminded me of the Marine for some reason. Looks wise, he has a lot of the same features of the Marine and also his sense of humor too. A few weeks ago when I was talking to the Marine I mentioned to him that I had met the Palestinian version of him. M is from Palestine and let me tell ya, he's got a great sexy accent. That might be one of the reasons I'm totally crushing on him too.

The 2nd week of class, M and I were walking out of the building together, he mentioned he was hungry and I said I was too (ya know I can always eat!) so he asked if I wanted to go get some sushi. Me being the naive chick here, I said sure. We were eating and talking about things when he told me he thought I was really cute and funny. Of course with a mouth full of sushi and the fact I needed to shower bad I was stunned. Me? Huh? What? I think I might have looked around the restaurant in hopes he was talking about someone else. He assured me again, there was something about me that caught his attention. I was shocked. Cute guys that I think are cute first don't ever find me attractive. We continued to chat and he asked me if I had a boyfriend. If you are following the time line here, it was 1 week and 4 days since I had met CBB. So I said I am single but dating. Heck the only answer I ever know is "yes, I'm completely and utterly single" I mean, I had no idea if CBB was a legit guy or not. And really, M and I were only eating dinner together at this point.

The week in between is when I had the several awesome hang outs w/ CBB. Come this last Monday, M and I were walking out of class w/ Katie. He said he was going to go get some food so I just said bye and hung by Katie. Katie then asked why the heck I didn't go w/ M. Umm I dunno why I didn't. So I called him real quick and asked if I could join him. He said he would love it if I did. We went to a little pizza joint and hung out. At one point he got up to go to the bathroom and when he came back he sat down next to me instead of across from me. He put his arm around me. It didn't feel weird. We talked more and more about family and life. At one point we kissed. The thoughts kept running through my head "is this a dream? Cuz it sure as heck feels like it" While I know there is technically nothing wrong with what I'm doing. CBB and I are not committed to each other. But this kind of stuff NEVER happens to me. Even when I was on Match.com, which is a dating heaven for people who like to see multiple people at a time, I always was just talking to one dude at a time. It's just weird.


What is a girl to do? I complain about joining the nunnery at one point, to all of a sudden having two guys thrown on my lap.

I think it's way to soon to call a relationship with either of these guys as well. They both have their pluses and negatives. To make matters even more confusing, they are complete opposites of each other. CBB is this big burly, "Wisconsin dude" manly man who wants to own his own brewery someday. M on the other hand is the good looking, suave, clean cut kind of guy who doesn't drink alcohol. I guess the only thing they have in common is that they like me.

As the story continues...

Soooooo this is what it feels like to date and actually have a good time? To get all giddy and excited when the boy you have a crush on texts you. I like the giddy feeling, but normally when I feel the giddy feeling I'm stuck w/ a panic attack to go right with it. The panic attack then takes over and I'm left thinking DATING SUCKS. The boy doesn't call back, the boy says he doesn't like to make plans, the boy disappears, the boy comes up w/ every excuse to not hang out w/ you but then keeps you latched on just for the heck of it.

Yes I know it's only been 2 weeks w/ CBB. Don't worry, I'm not planning our wedding or signing my name w/ his last name...yet...KIDDING. I wouldn't do that.

But the reasoning for my calm and cool demeanour? Because CBB has done the unthinkable.

He says what he means and does what he says. There haven't been mixed messages here. There hasn't been the "should I call him or will I annoy him?" worry. No "well he said he would call me, yet 4 days later my phone hasn't rung yet".

So if this is what dating is like, then sign me up folks, I'm having a good time for once!

Boy meets Girl

This is a story of boy meets girl.

Boy meets girl as he is kicking her out of the brewery due to it closing. Girl is feeling very ballsy and with a little liquid courage starts talking to bouncer boy. Bouncer boy knows drunk girls last name because he checked her ID at the front door. Drunk girl is intrigued by bouncer boy and starts talking to him about everything and anything. Drunk girl then decides that she should hang out w/ new found boy because he seems cool. Drunk girl gives her number to him and invites him out the next night. Drunk girl leaves the bar. Bouncer boy then texts drunk girl and invites her to bar again where he works.

From then on girl is finding herself hanging out at the brewery where boy works. Boy is very cute. Boy also thinks girl is cute and tells her that. Boy is very good about refilling beer for girl. This makes girl very happy.

Boy invites girl out to a friends party. Girl finds herself having a very good time and not feeling awkward. Girl is finding herself liking boy even more.

Boy and girl *finally* kiss in parking lot after boy takes girl back to her car.

Boy then texts girl to make sure she got home safe. *swoon*

Boy says fo sho which is one of girls favorite sayings.

Boy says he will call. Boy DOES call. Boy asks girl to go to Devil's Lake next Sunday.

Girl is happy.

Another one bites the dust....

Yup. You heard me right. Yet another guy is gone out of my life. Wha?!?! Did you miss some great story of me dating some random guy? Nope. It's sadly one of my good guy friends. Ray. Well I guess he isn't a good guy friend anymore huh?

Without going in to too much drama and sob story about the whole situation it's basically this. It wasn't a mutual defriend by any means. Yes there was an argument that happened back in APRIL that was apologized for the stupid things I said. I admit, I said stupid things. But guess what, I apologized right away and he said "don't worry about it" and then he said "I want to be the guy there for you" oh and the best line EVER "I'll call you tomorrow, I promise"

It's now JUNE. No call. No nothing. Oh yes, I have called. I have called quite a few times and text. Am I being crazy girl? Probably. But for the love of God, this guy has been my friend for the last 5 years. He has seen me thru all my ups and downs and is the person I tell 99% of my worries of life and everything under the sun. And we have only seen each other 3 times in our life. How does one become this close w/ a dude aside from marrying him? By talking on the phone for 5 years. That's how. And now it's all basically come to an end for me. I don't know what to do or say any more. I keep correlating this to the big breakup w/ Stupid Boy in 07. My feelings are hurt beyond belief right now. No guy has made me feel this way since Stupid Boy. The worst part of all............I don't even know what I did wrong!!!!!!!!!!! He won't even tell me why he isn't talking to me anymore. WHO DOES THAT TO THEIR FRIENDS? Yes, I have been partial to defriending some of my friends over the years, but with the other defriendings, there has been a last word of "don't talk to me every again" or "I hate you, you smell" not "I promise to call you tomorrow" And then NEVER hearing from them again!

I have come to the conclusion, I really can't trust what guys say anymore. Not even my guy friends. How sad is that?

Here are some of the great quotes guys have said to me that mean jack squat:

"If I don't call you for a few days, it doesn't mean I don't care, it just means I'm really busy" This was done by Shady Matt. Of course after saying this he proceeded to never call me back.

"I don't like to games" Said by Scuba Steve. Really Scuba? I think taking a good 48 hours to return a girls call back is playing games.

"Yeah, I can't wait to go to the concert tomorrow w/ you, I'll call you about details" This one was said by that Kurt guy a few months back. He ended up being sick and then getting rid of me the next day.

"I'll never let another guy hurt you" Said by yours truly, Stupid Boy. Little did he know after we broke my dating life has been all down hill.

"We should hang out sometime" Said by.....crap I can't remember his name...oh Preston. And I'm sure other guys have said those same words to me too.

"I don't want you to think I'm using you for a booty call" Of course The Marine. Yes, dude of course you are only wanting to use me for a booty call or for your NCAA basketball brackets.

"I'll call you sometime" Said by every guy out there.

I'm sure I could think of a trillion more, but that might just get a little too depressing.

I give up. I'm throwing in the towel at this point with the whole male species.

How does one enter the nunnery? Seriously.